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Daniel Kawczynski being a Conservative in 2008, unaware that this pastime would be outlawed in a dozen years

The Member of Parliament for Shrewsbury and Atcham, Daniel Kawczynski, is the type of immigrant we don’t hear much about as he is entirely the wrong colour scheme for modern political orthodoxies, having been born in Warsaw in 1972, and therefore as white as you would expect.

No, rather than single out Mr. Kawzcynski - that’s seven consonants in a row in that name, if you count y as a consonant, five more than Nietzsche, who falsely claimed Polish descent (could you not distract the reader with trivia? Ed.) - as the type of immigrant we should be proud of, the Conservative Party has instead reprimanded him for his attendance at a ‘Conservative conference’ in Rome.

What was the topic, who the dread conveners of this satanic pandemonium? Was one of the lectures called Eugenics Without Tears – The Life and Times of Josef Mengele? Was there some sort of black mass after canapés? Did someone from the KKK misgender someone? It was worse than that. It was a Conservative conference featuring Gotham City’s deadliest duo, Viktor Orbán and Matteo Salvini.

Kawczynski’s reprimand, which was quite serious in procedural terms, tells you everything you need to know about Johnson and the next generation of Blairism he and his false-flag cronies represent. Puckish American TV political pundit Greg Gutfeld calls this – and there will be plenty more where this came from due to Johnson and his Mockservatives - ‘cowering before the fringe’, and this wet-arse genuflection to a handful of overly empowered martinets will be the ruin of the country, or we here at BI are Dutchmen.

Johnson’s people have said this; although we are not personally conservatives, we get to decide what conservatism is and isn’t. Orbán and Salvini are both passionate about protecting their borders from an influx of expensive and aggressive foreigners, and this is somehow not conservative. The Guardian, who clearly adored the story, added brimstone to the bonfire by pointing out that some distant relative of Mussolini was also at the conference, as well as one of the Le Pen clan so despised by the Alt. Left. This was a party that was crying out for a fancy-dress bash after the speakers.

Along with tax and pension raids, a lowering of thresholds for African immigrants, an apparently wholesale acceptance of the ballocks foisted on ordinary people by the Green lobby, and no attempt to trim the fat off, say, the NHS – an organisation which deals with clinical obesity so much it has now contracted the condition – it all means that what we suspected is true. Johnson and his shonky prat-pack are just more of the same, Blairism in a brand-new onesie, politics utterly unchanged. It’s still a low-grade Punch and Judy Show, they’ve just changed the model of Mr. Punch. The show is the same. That’s the way to do it.

Forget Islamophobia, homophobia, transhobia and all the other ideological trinkets ginned up by the Left. The new kid on the block is ideophobia, the fear of the idea, a real phobia, a real god (Phobos was the son of Ares and Aphrodite, or Venus and Mars), and a moon in plain sight (Phobos is also one of the Martian moons, rotating a mere… ((My understanding was that we had covered trivia and our, my, policy on it. Ed.)))

Just as Monty Python once featured a sketch concerning the world’s funniest joke, a joke so powerful it could kill people, so now the British Conservative Party – which is as coherent a phrase as a Quaker glee club or Puritan knees-up – has decided that there are political ideas which are ‘unacceptable’.

Meet the new Phobos, same as the old Phobos.

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