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Priti in pink. But Ms. Patel is not the right kind of brown person for the Left.

British Home Secretary Priti Patel should be a wet dream for Britain’s Left. A successful Asian woman, she has busted through every glass ceiling going and come out the other side without so much as a shard of glass in her hair. Also, on an entirely unrelated matter, she is the most kissable woman in UK politics, the rest of the field looking as though they have stepped out of paintings by Breughel, Bacon or Bosch. You get the impression with Priti that if you warmed her up with a mutton balti and a bit of upmarket sitar music, you might get the kiss to end all kisses. It would have to be at her place, mind. We couldn’t bring her back to British Intelligence HQ, not unless we took down the Oswald Mosley and Charlie Manson pics and hid the Nazi memorabilia. But where were we?

As we have seen, it is now the time where intersectionality begins to eat itself, like the worm Ouroboros devouring its own tail. We’ve seen gays thrown under the bus in favour of the Left’s house pets in the Islamic quarter. We are now seeing the transgender lobby coming up against that same Mohammedan dogma, and the Left are scampering about trying to please both parties. But now we have an Asian woman on the receiving end of Leftist bile, and we wonder if we will see the same cognitive dissonance. No, is the answer, but before we look at why the Left are at their ease trying to force out Patel, let’s look at the charge against her of ‘bullying’, with regards to some limp-wristed civil servants – partisan bastards since at least Blair – and, in fact, look at workplace bullying itself.

Now, we have warned here before about the dangers of false extrapolation, or taking one example to be representative of, and thereby proving, the validity and consistency of a universal. Here, though, we are going to break our rule and give an example of someone known to this writer who had to face disciplinary procedure for the supposed offence of ‘workplace bullying’.

The chap in question is a chief sub-editor on a London-based music magazine, and one of his colleagues – a woman – consistently handed in what he found to be sub-par copy. In his capacity as chief sub, he made alterations, and also corrected the writer’s work with occasional re-writes. This is very much an integral part of such a position. One fine day, he was called into the editor’s office to find his boss with the tearful woman. He was accused of workplace bullying for changing her execrable prose. There was a disciplinary hearing which she won, subsequently being awarded damages. He was forced to apologise and given a verbal warning. For doing his job. This fellow is a master of the English language, but it was a woman and there had been a complaint. That was enough for the tribunal.

Well, you might say and sigh, sign of the times. This was twenty fucking years ago. What’s it like now?

Patel is supposed to have bullied various civil servants who are now coming out of the woodwork as the Left – spearheaded by The Guardian, naturally – mobilise and train their artillery on potentially the best Home Secretary the UK has had in decades, in that she is actually a Conservative.

Firstly, any man who is bullied by a woman might as well, to quote The Kinks, pull his frilly nylon panties right up tight because he isn’t fit to be called a man. Secondly, this is blatant interference by the media and the supposedly non-partisan civil service to remove someone not to their political liking from office.

And why is she not to their liking? Apart from being a Tory, Patel is a Hindu – not the Indian flavour the Left like, especially since the warm reception they gave Trump - and has also been linked favourably with Israel and, if you have to have the malevolent Left’s hatred of Jews explained to you, you shouldn’t be allowed to use scissors.

This, curiously, is the biggest test Boris Johnson has faced yet. If he backs down and allows Patel to be forced to walk the plank, he will be looking at a lot more of this type of behaviour from the malevolent Left, the real bullies as they are at all levels of their tawdry ideology. If he tells the media and the civil to do one, he may set the tone for actual Conservatism to emerge like a butterfly from a chrysalis.

We here at British Intelligence hope that Patel swats away these Leftist gnats, and that we continue to see both her anti-crime and sensible immigration policies in action, and her curvaceous good looks gracing screen and page.

Saubhaagy, Ms. Patel, or ‘good luck’ in Hindi.

Photo credit - H M Government

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